Bussen – Novelle af Saneh Jaleh

Ved siden af den unge mand sidder en gammel mand med en cigaret.

Det tredje sug af cigaretten og den unge mand venter på røgen.

Den gamle lader røgen sive ud. Røgen rammer den unge. Han hoster let, men den gamle hører det ikke. Cigaretten går op og ned og han slår asken af på gulvet i bussen.

Den unges øjne følger den gamle mands hånd.

Den unges blik lader den gamle alene og kigger ud af vinduet.

Enkeltsædet er blevet ledigt. Damen, som sad der, ændrede måske planer, måske havde hun glemt noget, måske kunne hun ikke holde cigaretrøgen ud.

Uanset hvad, er det den unge mands held, og han flytter to skridt længere væk fra røgen. Han sætter sig i sædet, klistret til vinduet og føler sig kold. Hans krop slapper af i sædet, og han lukker øjnene. Der er et lille smil på hans læber, men det forsvinder i det øjeblik han hører lyden fra motoren. Hans øjne er nu åbne og han læner sig tilbage i sædet.

Han ser ud af vinduet, følger damens korte langsomme trin. Hendes venstre hånd er nær hendes øre og hun taler uafbrudt, uden tanker om at vende om, hendes åbenlyse glæde ved at vende ryggen til.

Han ser på uret. Klokken er præcis 14:35.

Nu kigger han i sin pung. Kun 50 tomans. En taxa koster præcis 50 tomans. Et smil. Det smil minder ham om en gammel mands smil, og hans eget smil inden han kom på bussen. En gammel mand hvis optræden ikke afveg ret meget fra den gamle mand i bussen, men som ikke talte til hans samvittighed.

Bussen er nu i bevægelse. Chaufføren kigger i spejlene og trykker forsigtigt på speederen. Han holder øje med chaufføren der bevæger hånden når han skifter gear. Bagsiden af hans hoved er mere interessant. Tyndt gulligt hår som går fra det bagerste af hans nakke til under midten af hans hoved. Fordi han ikke har noget hår foran, tænker den unge mand: ”Ah en rolig, skaldet chauffør.”

Bussen kører ud fra busrækken. Passagererne  kigger ud af vinduerne på cement-bygningerne ved vejkrydset, halvt gule, halvt sorte. Hvilket latterligt farve-skema, tænker de for sig selv. Med et stopper bussen. Chaufføren kommer hurtigt ud. Et par andre  chauffører slutter sig til ham da han åbner motorhjelmen. De kigger alle på motoren. Den unge mand kan se en række hoveder bevæge sig op og ned, og nogle gange til siden.

Et velkendt hoved dukker op, åbner døren, og klatrer tilbage i bussen. Den unge mand kan nu se hans ansigt. Han siger: ”Kære passagerer. Motoren er i stykker. Det vil ikke tage lang tid at reparere. Selvfølgelig skal vi udskifte noget. Det vil kun tage en halv time, hvis I venter en halv time, vil det blive ordnet og vi vil køre.”

Latter, eller ophidselse, eller ligegyldighed, er de følelser han vækker i os. Med en halv times venten kommer alle hurtigt ud for at varme sig ved en kop varm te eller kaffe. Den gamle mand tager en cigaret fra pakken og kommer roligt ud af bussen efter alle andre. Han foretrækker sikkert en cigaret i den kolde luft, tænker den unge mand. Han bliver hvor han er, fordi han ikke gider besværet, og fordi han ingen penge har. Han trækker lynlåsen i sin jakke helt op og stirrer ud af forruden på bussen. Han kniber øjnene sammen, mens han fokuserer på noget som han forbinder med en dårlig følelse.

Han vælger at vende historien på ny. Han ser på sit ur. Den er præcis 14:35. Han siger stille, historien vil ende inden 25 minutter.

Det var kl. 13.00. Han tog ud til busterminalen for at finde en ven eller en bekendt. Han havde kun 50 tomans. Det var derfor han ledte efter sine venner. Han skulle bruge 450 tomans til lejen. Han så på alle han mødte, men fik ikke øje på en ven. Efter at have søgt  gennem hele terminalen orkede han ikke længere at stå.

Alene sad han i en stol i den bagerste ende i terminalen langs med vejen, mens han sagde for sig selv: ”Det er bedre på denne måde.”

Han stirrede  på sine sko og strakte benene. Hans hænder lå på knæene, da noget uventet sker.

Utroligt, der er en 500 toman-seddel ved hans fødder. Han ønsker at tro det. Mandens hjerte banker et øjeblik, men så, mere alene end nogensinde før, siger han for sig selv: ”Det er bedre på denne måde.”

Håbløs siger han:

”Ja, Hr. Gå videre.”

Manden svarer: ”Du har tabt dine penge.”

 

Med et  smil svarer den unge mand:

”Hvor?

Oh her er de, jeg fandt dem.

Mange tak frue.”

”Velbekomme.” Og han hører kvindens fodtrin forsvinde.

Hun går mod bussen. Da hun kommer frem til bussen, tager hun en billet i tasken og viser den. Inde i bussen, forsvinder hun for ham. Hun sidder sikkert i den anden side, siger han til sig selv.

Han kommer pengene i sin pung, utilpas, men glad. Med pungen i hånden husker han de 1000 toman sedler, han havde haft. Han spørger sig selv: ”Fortalte den gamle mand sandheden?” Han fortæller sig selv, at det ikke havde noget at gøre med ham, at han gjorde sin pligt. Han genkalder den gamle mands smil, smilende. Han kontrollerer tiden. Den er 14.00. Han ønsker at gense sidste nats begivenheder igen. Han rejser sig og går ind i busterminalen, finder en behagelig stol. Den er 5 minutter over to. ”Eventyret vil ende om nøjagtig 25 minutter,”  siger han stille til sig selv.

Det er mørkt. Præcis 20.00. Han klæder sig omhyggeligt på, som altid lyner han jakken. Han pudser sine sko med en klud og tager dem på. Han åbner døren for at gå, lukker den stille efter sig. Hans natlige ritual med at flakke rundt i gaderne en time, begynder. Det er koldt uden for. Han går stille. Han kigger på de andre, men er fortabt i sine egne tanker. Gaderne er tomme. En kold vind rammer ham. Han fortaber sig i tanker, som alle andre aftener. Han opdager ikke en  gammel mand som følger ham. Måske fordi han ikke ventede følgeskab. Men den gamle mand gør sin tilstedeværelse mærkbar. Før det havde der ikke været andre på gaden. Med uro og angst siger han hurtigt:

”Min søn. Min søn… min søn har været ude for en ulykke.”

Den unge mand hører kun denne sætning og stirrer på en mappe og et stykke papir den gamle mand holder.

På papiret står: Øjeblikkelig anmodning om Blodtype O. Han ser på den gamle mand. Det lader til at han tier nu. Den unge mand siger: ”Hvordan kan jeg hjælpe?”

Den gamle mand svarer: ”Jeg har brug for 2700 tomans; manden med blodtype O har sagt, han ikke vil give blod før han får alle pengene.” Uden tøven, stikker den unge mand hånden i lommen. Han overrækker tre 1000 toman sedler. Den gamle mand smiler stort, mens han siger: ”Min søn, jeg takker dig af hele mit hjerte. Giv mig dit nummer eller adresse, eller tag mit identitetskort.” Han siger den sidste sætning langsomt. Men den unge mand distancerer sig fra den gamle mand og går videre. Tredive fyrre skridt væk,  går det op for ham, at den gamle mand måske ikke  fortæller sandheden. Han beslutter at det ikke har noget at gøre med ham, at han har gjort sin pligt.

Han ser på uret. Klokken er nøjagtig 14:35. Bussen er fyldt. Han går imod den. Der er kun et ledigt sæde, ved siden af en gammel mand. Enkeltsædet modsat er optaget af en kvinde.

Han ser igen på uret. Klokken er nøjagtig 15:00. Døren åbnes og passagererne kommer tilbage en efter en til deres sæder. Chaufføren er på sin plads. Han sætter foden på speederen, hårdere denne gang, motoren brøler. Bussen sætter i gang med større hastighed. Den unge mand stirrer på cement bygningerne, blokke af halv gul, halv sort. Hvilket latterligt farve-skema,  tænker han for sig selv. Netop nu ser han en ung mand ved skillevejen, han går langsomt med hovedet bøjet; han leder måske efter noget, eller også gør han ikke. Ved slutningen af den sætning lukker han øjnene.

 

Oversat til dansk (fra engelsk) af Bjarne Kim Pedersen

Saneh Jaleh 26 årig Kunst studerende ved Tehrans Kunst Universitet blev dræbt af regerings styrker eller basij-militsen under demonstrationer 14 februar.

Saneh Jalehs short story Bussen er skrevet på farsi og blev trykt i Azma Magasinet.

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